1/15/11

I can feel myself slipping back into my old patterns. I haven't exercised in 2 days...I keep telling myself that I am tired, that I have to get other things done...I can feel myself not taking time for me. I did get some fun time yesterday evening and last night. I scrap-booked with a friend. I got 6 new pages done...it doesn't seem like i accomplished a lot but in the grand scheme of things I really did. The pictures I used were from our trip 2 years ago. Our weekend in Atlanta. We had a blast. It was one of the best weekends ever. I still have a long way to go, but that is my goal every Friday to archive my memories. I love looking at those pictures because they bring back such good memories for us. But that only makes me want to try harder to get healthy. So that I can keep making memories. I really need to take care of me. I need to keep my focus on me...and not making everyone else aruond me happy...I need to learn to make myself happy! I need to do things for me. So that I feel good about myself. I know this must sound pretty selfish....but I have been unselfish for most of my life. It has always been about making someone else happy or feel good about themselves. I feel like the goodyear blimp. I feel so huge. I need to do something about it....so here we go....back to the diet. I feel I need to conquer this once and for all! I am done playing games with myself. I am only cheating me...and you know what....that SUCKS! Only I can make me feel better!