"Other people and things can stop you temporarily. You're the only one who can do it permanently." ~Zig Ziglar~
I found this quote online this morning. It just hit me like it was meant for me. I had a goal this morning. I wanted to be up at 530 and out the door and in the gym by 6am. Well when you wake up at 630 obviously that isnt going to happen. When I got on the scale this morning I weighed in at 217.8, so aggravated but more aggravated at myself than anyone else. another pound and 4 oz. Whose fault is that...MINE! Po Folks didnt force me to eat there last night. Shane didnt force me...as a matter of fact if I remember correctly it was my idea....UM what exactly was I thinking. I was thinking that I could not get the country fried steak and mashed potatoes with both kinds of gravy....I was thinking I would make myself eat healthy. Did that happen....UM NO! Who am I kidding, I do not have the willpower YET, to do those things. I cant blame anyone but myself for those actions. I cant keep putting myself in temptations way until I am strong enough in myself to beat it, and then I cant be mad at anyone else for not getting up this morning. I can only be mad at myself. What is being mad going to do....I can tell you what it will do for me....It will put me in a bad mood for the day. I do NOT want to spend my day being mad. I want to spend my day getting things accomplished. So I didnt go to the gym at 6am. Who cares....I have all day to go that is why we bought a 24 hour gym membership. As long as I go and work myself hard, does it truly matter what time of day I go. I dont think so. I am the only one who can permanently affect me. I intend to do just that....Now off to mommas for her physical therapy and then to the gym....it is going to be a good day....after all it is my life and it is what I make it.......Living the life and loving the living!!!
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
4/19/11 U-turns...
So today is going to be my uturn day...by that I mean it will be the day that I can look back on and say that I did what I needed to do to get my life back on track. i got up this morning...a little later than i wanted to, weighed (216), got a shower, made the hunny breakfast, went to let the physical therapist in at Mommas, and stayed with her, came back home picked up the guys and headed to the gym. A little over an hour, a little over a mile on the treadmill, 2 miles on the bike, 3 sets of chin ups and dips, grilled chicken salad, and now blogging, then to editing for a little while. Then I have to go take Momma to class so that she can collect the notebooks for her students so that she can give them their grades, and then to Walmart...I HAVE TO GROCERY SHOP...we will not be eating if I dont. I am so far behind, I cant seem to find enough hours in the day. I need to hire an assistant...yeah right.... Like I can afford that. But such is life. I will get caught up soon. I think Shane is going to try to help me. I hope!!! I am super excited to be getting back on track. I only gained 8oz... but that was due to eating BK twice yesterday....even though it was just the sandwich and coke... it wasnt good for me. I have to start thinking a little differently... Start planning a little better when I know that we have things to do and will be out all day..and take healthy stuff with us. anyway...I had an amazing day yesterday. Learned so much! Wiregrass Area Professional Photographers Association membes ROCK!! I am so thankful to be able to be in a place where people care about other people. They care enough to help them learn. I guess I should hush now and get started editing....see ya tomorrow.... I am proud of myself for keeping up with this blog....looking forward to revamping my website and starting another photography blog!!!
Monday, April 18, 2011
4/18/11 Enough.....
I was reminded of the scene from The Mexican {Julia Roberts; Brad Pitt, James Gandolfini} – when Julia looks over to James Gandolfini’s hit man character and asks, “If two people REALLY love each other, but they just can’t seem to get it together…when do you get to that point of enough is enough?”
And Gandolfini looks at Jules and in his rather larger than life Sopranos Perfected accent says, quite simply, “Never.”
So my pebble today is going to be to believing myself. I have had a hard time doing that lately. I know that I should and I know that noone else is really able to do this if I dont do it for myself. So today I am going to start the day believing in me. Believing that I can do this. I can live this life and get what I want and to where I want to be. Over the past few years most other people in my shoes would quite quickly tell you that they had had enough....a few times I would have told you that as well. But my heart always told me differently. I am thankful that I listened to my heart instead of my head. There have been times in my life that I have wondered if that was the right thing to do. I have wondered if that was the SANE thing for me to do...
There are 2 things in my life that I am absolutely certain about....there is no doubt...OK now that I am trying to pick just 2....there are so many more than that....
First and foremost I am completely certain that I have the most amazing husband who is so much more to me than JUST a husband. He shares my dreams and pushes me daily toward them....all the while being the solid rock that holds me together, at the same time he is the soft place to fall if I slip...Amazing doesnt even begin to describe him....
Secondly....Photography is so much more than a job for me...it truly is a passion. It is the one thing that I will never give up on... It is something that I will always strive to be better at. I have always loved taking pictures...but the moment that made that made that reality a dream was in 2003 when one of my best friends visited me in Phenix City, Al with her boys. We took them to the riverwalk and took some pictures (on a film camera) and I couldnt wait to get them developed there was one specific photo that I was absolutely excited about. The older one was climbing on the bridge looking over and he leaned back and held his had out for his little brother to climb up.....it was the pivotal moment that I absolutely knew that photography of some sort would always be a dream for me. A lot of things happened in the new few years after that, My life was completely changed....Divorced, to a bad relationship, to a new relationship to married again. In 2008, My husband bought me a Sony Alpha 350... that man and that camera have since changed my whole outlook on life. That dream has morphed into a reality. Since then he has bought me 2 more cameras. First a Nikon D60 and most recently a D90 for Valentines day. Photography is no longer a dream...IT IS A REALITY! Something I never thought would happen but he did that for me.
Thirdly I have the most amazing family and friends a girl could EVER ask for. I have a set of very close friends that are more like family and then recently have extended that realm to include some fabulous photographers that have taught me soooooooo much in the last few months. More than I ever could have imagined....Do I know ALL there is about PHOTOGRAPHY...ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! I hope I never do. I know more today than I knew last week...Heck I know more about photography today than I did yesterday. I hope it always stays that way. I hope I learn something new every day....something new about Myself, About My love, About my life, and about PHOTOGRAPHY! I honestly dont think Enough will EVER be Enough in these areas of my life. These are the things that I live for...the reasons I get out of bed every day....the very breath of my existence....I wouldnt change them for the world.
I am worth every effort I put into myself. I only get one chance at this life.....I intend to make the most of it. Thank you Shane Allen Oates... for all that you are, for all that you allow me to be....and for loving me regardless.....ENOUGH WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH for me when it comes to you and to us....I Love you BIG! FOREVER!
Speaking of efforts I am putting into myself. I lost 3 more lbs. I am currently at 215.2. I am so excited...I cant even remember when the last time I weighed 215 was. I dont want to be super skinny....I dont want to even be considered skinny...that is nowhere near my goal. I want to be healthy. I want to be able to breathe when I lay down at night.....I want to be able to run from 1 block to the next without falling on my face and dying from exhaustion..... I want to be able to climb mountains and take pictures from the most beautiful views. I want to be able to run after a toddler and get the best pictures...I just want to be healthy....I feel like maybe just maybe I am finally on the track to healthy....A girl can dream right.....I was around 255 when I started this journey last year....A roller coaster ride...my highest was about 280 i think a few years ago....15 more pounds and I will be out of the 200's..... I am so ready!!!! I can do this....I will do this...I am worth it....We are worth it....Life is mine for the living and I want to live every moment of it!!!!
Thank you Casie for reminding me this morning that Enough is never enough....and thank you Shane for continuing to remind me daily that ENOUGH WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH!!!
And Gandolfini looks at Jules and in his rather larger than life Sopranos Perfected accent says, quite simply, “Never.”
So my pebble today is going to be to believing myself. I have had a hard time doing that lately. I know that I should and I know that noone else is really able to do this if I dont do it for myself. So today I am going to start the day believing in me. Believing that I can do this. I can live this life and get what I want and to where I want to be. Over the past few years most other people in my shoes would quite quickly tell you that they had had enough....a few times I would have told you that as well. But my heart always told me differently. I am thankful that I listened to my heart instead of my head. There have been times in my life that I have wondered if that was the right thing to do. I have wondered if that was the SANE thing for me to do...
There are 2 things in my life that I am absolutely certain about....there is no doubt...OK now that I am trying to pick just 2....there are so many more than that....
First and foremost I am completely certain that I have the most amazing husband who is so much more to me than JUST a husband. He shares my dreams and pushes me daily toward them....all the while being the solid rock that holds me together, at the same time he is the soft place to fall if I slip...Amazing doesnt even begin to describe him....
Secondly....Photography is so much more than a job for me...it truly is a passion. It is the one thing that I will never give up on... It is something that I will always strive to be better at. I have always loved taking pictures...but the moment that made that made that reality a dream was in 2003 when one of my best friends visited me in Phenix City, Al with her boys. We took them to the riverwalk and took some pictures (on a film camera) and I couldnt wait to get them developed there was one specific photo that I was absolutely excited about. The older one was climbing on the bridge looking over and he leaned back and held his had out for his little brother to climb up.....it was the pivotal moment that I absolutely knew that photography of some sort would always be a dream for me. A lot of things happened in the new few years after that, My life was completely changed....Divorced, to a bad relationship, to a new relationship to married again. In 2008, My husband bought me a Sony Alpha 350... that man and that camera have since changed my whole outlook on life. That dream has morphed into a reality. Since then he has bought me 2 more cameras. First a Nikon D60 and most recently a D90 for Valentines day. Photography is no longer a dream...IT IS A REALITY! Something I never thought would happen but he did that for me.
Thirdly I have the most amazing family and friends a girl could EVER ask for. I have a set of very close friends that are more like family and then recently have extended that realm to include some fabulous photographers that have taught me soooooooo much in the last few months. More than I ever could have imagined....Do I know ALL there is about PHOTOGRAPHY...ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! I hope I never do. I know more today than I knew last week...Heck I know more about photography today than I did yesterday. I hope it always stays that way. I hope I learn something new every day....something new about Myself, About My love, About my life, and about PHOTOGRAPHY! I honestly dont think Enough will EVER be Enough in these areas of my life. These are the things that I live for...the reasons I get out of bed every day....the very breath of my existence....I wouldnt change them for the world.
I am worth every effort I put into myself. I only get one chance at this life.....I intend to make the most of it. Thank you Shane Allen Oates... for all that you are, for all that you allow me to be....and for loving me regardless.....ENOUGH WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH for me when it comes to you and to us....I Love you BIG! FOREVER!
Speaking of efforts I am putting into myself. I lost 3 more lbs. I am currently at 215.2. I am so excited...I cant even remember when the last time I weighed 215 was. I dont want to be super skinny....I dont want to even be considered skinny...that is nowhere near my goal. I want to be healthy. I want to be able to breathe when I lay down at night.....I want to be able to run from 1 block to the next without falling on my face and dying from exhaustion..... I want to be able to climb mountains and take pictures from the most beautiful views. I want to be able to run after a toddler and get the best pictures...I just want to be healthy....I feel like maybe just maybe I am finally on the track to healthy....A girl can dream right.....I was around 255 when I started this journey last year....A roller coaster ride...my highest was about 280 i think a few years ago....15 more pounds and I will be out of the 200's..... I am so ready!!!! I can do this....I will do this...I am worth it....We are worth it....Life is mine for the living and I want to live every moment of it!!!!
Thank you Casie for reminding me this morning that Enough is never enough....and thank you Shane for continuing to remind me daily that ENOUGH WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH!!!
Sunday, April 17, 2011
4/17/11 Determination....
Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain. ~Author Unknown
Today I will find the determination within myself to get past the pebbles. I am learning to believe in myself. I am learning to do new things and take risks without knowing the outcome. It is very scary for me. I have always wanted to anticipate the outcome and know exactly what was coming my way and how I was going to deal with it. I dont think that is really living....I think its safe just being.....I am tired of being safe. Today I woke up at the exact same time as I did yesterday and I weighed in at the exact same. Its kind of eye opening that I am going to be stuck in my same little box if I dont do something to start tearing down the wall on that box. NOT AN OPTION!!! I am very blessed to be on the adventure of a lifetime....So I cant have kids....a lot of people cant, they learn to move past it....I am sure that is going to be a pebble in my path for quite a while.....but I am determined to get past it. My life truly has been blessed. I have an amazing husband that believes in me like no other. Who picked up my dreams from a broken me and pieced them back together and made them worth fighting for again..And he dreams the same dreams...Not many people can say they do what they love, with who they love and love what they do. I can. He consistently makes things happen for me. If I dont understand something, if he doesn't know the answer he searches until he finds it. When I am ready to give up, he says lets try one more time....I couldn't ask for any better than that. He is my rock, my strength and my hope. He is my fairytale....so I dont have the white picket fence...I have a bigger yard than most, I have a house that we have made a home. I dont have a yard full of children....I do have furry friends that love me unconditionally and are quite happy to see me. But most of all I have the unconditional love of a family, that have become more like a family to me than my own sometimes. They welcomed me with open arms, never judging. I have recently been reacquainted with members of my own family that are truly amazing and I hate that I have wasted so much time not knowing them better. Who am I to be looking at the things that I dont have and dwell on them. I should be looking at the things I do have and being thankful. Today I look forward, only glancing over my shoulder to remember why I am looking forward. No one ever said the journey would be easy....they only said that it would be worth it. Today I will take the risks...today I will love like there is no tomorrow....today I will make things happen....Today I will love me! Because I am worth it....and my family is worth it.
The journey is on track....It is my life, and it is what I make it...
Life is like a book, and I intend to fill every page with this journey. Destination unknown......
Today I will find the determination within myself to get past the pebbles. I am learning to believe in myself. I am learning to do new things and take risks without knowing the outcome. It is very scary for me. I have always wanted to anticipate the outcome and know exactly what was coming my way and how I was going to deal with it. I dont think that is really living....I think its safe just being.....I am tired of being safe. Today I woke up at the exact same time as I did yesterday and I weighed in at the exact same. Its kind of eye opening that I am going to be stuck in my same little box if I dont do something to start tearing down the wall on that box. NOT AN OPTION!!! I am very blessed to be on the adventure of a lifetime....So I cant have kids....a lot of people cant, they learn to move past it....I am sure that is going to be a pebble in my path for quite a while.....but I am determined to get past it. My life truly has been blessed. I have an amazing husband that believes in me like no other. Who picked up my dreams from a broken me and pieced them back together and made them worth fighting for again..And he dreams the same dreams...Not many people can say they do what they love, with who they love and love what they do. I can. He consistently makes things happen for me. If I dont understand something, if he doesn't know the answer he searches until he finds it. When I am ready to give up, he says lets try one more time....I couldn't ask for any better than that. He is my rock, my strength and my hope. He is my fairytale....so I dont have the white picket fence...I have a bigger yard than most, I have a house that we have made a home. I dont have a yard full of children....I do have furry friends that love me unconditionally and are quite happy to see me. But most of all I have the unconditional love of a family, that have become more like a family to me than my own sometimes. They welcomed me with open arms, never judging. I have recently been reacquainted with members of my own family that are truly amazing and I hate that I have wasted so much time not knowing them better. Who am I to be looking at the things that I dont have and dwell on them. I should be looking at the things I do have and being thankful. Today I look forward, only glancing over my shoulder to remember why I am looking forward. No one ever said the journey would be easy....they only said that it would be worth it. Today I will take the risks...today I will love like there is no tomorrow....today I will make things happen....Today I will love me! Because I am worth it....and my family is worth it.
The journey is on track....It is my life, and it is what I make it...
Life is like a book, and I intend to fill every page with this journey. Destination unknown......
Saturday, April 16, 2011
4/16/11 Miracles.....
Today I saw the sweetest little miracles....
20 little fingers...20 little toes...
The smallest little ones I have ever held.
How can you not believe in miracles when you hold 3lbs 12 oz of a little life in your hand?
I go back and forth with this demon of wanting to be a mother...I tell myself that I am over it...and I will be ok if it never happens. 15 years and 9 miscarriages later you would think I would totally give up the idea. But somehow when I see these precious little lives its hard to know that that will never be me. To know that I will never get the gift of giving someone life. To know that I will never hear a childs voice call me mommy. I watched today with huge admiration as my friends 3 year old came in to see her new little sisters and her face light up as she sat on the bed beside her momma...I literally almost busted out in tears because that is tenderness and love I will never know. Yes I have known the love of children when it was convenient for someone else to want me to spend time with them, but at the end of the day they will always have a mother and at the end of every day that mother will not be me. All I have ever wanted, something I will never have. How do you let go of something that has driven you for so many years? How do you let go of that hope and realize that it was never meant to be you? So many attempts at different aspects of trying to have a baby or adopt...nothing... So how do I walk away from that? How do I let go? Yesterday marked the 8th anniversary of one of the most devastating days in my life. I lost my own smallest miracles... I was so sure that was going to be the one to take. that was going to be the pregnancy that I was able to hang on to...it just seemed so right. It was supposed to be me with those 20 tiny toes and 20 little fingers and those sweet little smiles. One day we had heartbeats and the next day they were gone. I felt like the life had been sucked out of me. It was the longest I ever carried. The most attached I had ever felt. I knew that I was going to finally be a mommy. I should have known better. I wish it was easy just to walk away from the dream. I wish I could wake up one day and the desire would be gone. I dont know if I will ever understand why it couldn't be me...what I did that was so wrong. I know people that should never ever have been given such a blessing...but they were and those children have been so hurt, and thrown away. I want to go up to some people and literally point them out to God and ask why.... and then I want to choke the life out of them because they dont deserve what they have been given. I just dont understand. Maybe I never will....
I wish I could be happy with just being an Auntie....
I just wish I could let it all go.
The whole little girl dream.....the same every little girl dreams....
The little white house....
The white picket fence....
The Amazing Husband...(this one I have)
The yard full of kids....
Some people dont get the fairytale....not even when it is all they have ever wanted.... I just wish it hadn't been my dream....I wish it didn't mean so much to me....
One foot in front of the other....keep going.....
just breathe.....breathe...breathe...
20 little fingers...20 little toes...
The smallest little ones I have ever held.
How can you not believe in miracles when you hold 3lbs 12 oz of a little life in your hand?
I go back and forth with this demon of wanting to be a mother...I tell myself that I am over it...and I will be ok if it never happens. 15 years and 9 miscarriages later you would think I would totally give up the idea. But somehow when I see these precious little lives its hard to know that that will never be me. To know that I will never get the gift of giving someone life. To know that I will never hear a childs voice call me mommy. I watched today with huge admiration as my friends 3 year old came in to see her new little sisters and her face light up as she sat on the bed beside her momma...I literally almost busted out in tears because that is tenderness and love I will never know. Yes I have known the love of children when it was convenient for someone else to want me to spend time with them, but at the end of the day they will always have a mother and at the end of every day that mother will not be me. All I have ever wanted, something I will never have. How do you let go of something that has driven you for so many years? How do you let go of that hope and realize that it was never meant to be you? So many attempts at different aspects of trying to have a baby or adopt...nothing... So how do I walk away from that? How do I let go? Yesterday marked the 8th anniversary of one of the most devastating days in my life. I lost my own smallest miracles... I was so sure that was going to be the one to take. that was going to be the pregnancy that I was able to hang on to...it just seemed so right. It was supposed to be me with those 20 tiny toes and 20 little fingers and those sweet little smiles. One day we had heartbeats and the next day they were gone. I felt like the life had been sucked out of me. It was the longest I ever carried. The most attached I had ever felt. I knew that I was going to finally be a mommy. I should have known better. I wish it was easy just to walk away from the dream. I wish I could wake up one day and the desire would be gone. I dont know if I will ever understand why it couldn't be me...what I did that was so wrong. I know people that should never ever have been given such a blessing...but they were and those children have been so hurt, and thrown away. I want to go up to some people and literally point them out to God and ask why.... and then I want to choke the life out of them because they dont deserve what they have been given. I just dont understand. Maybe I never will....
I wish I could be happy with just being an Auntie....
I just wish I could let it all go.
The whole little girl dream.....the same every little girl dreams....
The little white house....
The white picket fence....
The Amazing Husband...(this one I have)
The yard full of kids....
Some people dont get the fairytale....not even when it is all they have ever wanted.... I just wish it hadn't been my dream....I wish it didn't mean so much to me....
One foot in front of the other....keep going.....
just breathe.....breathe...breathe...
Friday, April 8, 2011
Never be afraid to try, remember Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic. Author Unknown.....
Today I will not be afraid to try something new. I dont know what it will be yet but it will be something and I will not be afraid. I will set my sight and follow thru. I am so excited that I got up this morning and the number on the scale has decreased by 1 lb 8 oz. Not much but I will take it! Not to bad for not really having the chance to exercise. Today I will try to throw in some exercise. I have a million things to do today...but that is ok...what I dont finish today will still be there for next week. I am looking forward to this weekend. I have a family reunion for the first time ever. I will be seeing cousins that I have not seen in years. It is sad that it took another death in the family for us to do this....but at least we are doing it. I will be thinking about Rhonda a lot tomorrow, this is so something that she would have loved and been right in the middle of. I really wish things had been different between she and I over these last few years. But they weren't. I have to move past this and keep my journey going. I want to make the most of this journey, live each day like it could be my last and have no regrets. If I were to die tomorrow I want people to happily remember me, not hate that they have known me. I think this next week I will start a bucket list. Do I plan on dying anytime soon...absolutely not but we are never promised tomorrow. So I will make the most of today! I will love all that life has to offer me and be thankful that I have been blessed with what truly matters, life, love, family, and friendship! I read yesterday where a lady was living paycheck to paycheck on $174,000 a year. Really....we live paycheck to paycheck on A LOT LESS than that....maybe an 8th of that....really...Selfish much. We are always scraping to make ends meet. But we make the best of what we have and for that I am very thankful.... This blog has been kind of all over the place....but that is ok...its mine... :) and I am kinda all over the place!! ;) I am learning to truly love me for me. and I am ok with that! I know that must sound corny but it is true....I hope you all have a wonderful day...and the thought you should be thinking today I have adopted from Brooke Noel is that :Something great is going to happen to me today and I cant wait to see what it is.: I am super excited to find happiness in the little things in life...like finishing a photo session, booking another photo session... my big puppy curling up and laying her head on my feet, the unconditional love of family, the amazingness of friendship...true friendship....the absolute thrill of learning something new in photography. But you know what makes my day...is my husband sneaking up behind me and wrapping his arms around me and snuggling in close and kissing my neck and him telling me that he loves me and he is so glad he is here with me....the little things are all that matters..... Its the little things in life that bring me the most happiness!!! Hopefully I will be back later today to tell you what was new that I tried today.....
Today I will not be afraid to try something new. I dont know what it will be yet but it will be something and I will not be afraid. I will set my sight and follow thru. I am so excited that I got up this morning and the number on the scale has decreased by 1 lb 8 oz. Not much but I will take it! Not to bad for not really having the chance to exercise. Today I will try to throw in some exercise. I have a million things to do today...but that is ok...what I dont finish today will still be there for next week. I am looking forward to this weekend. I have a family reunion for the first time ever. I will be seeing cousins that I have not seen in years. It is sad that it took another death in the family for us to do this....but at least we are doing it. I will be thinking about Rhonda a lot tomorrow, this is so something that she would have loved and been right in the middle of. I really wish things had been different between she and I over these last few years. But they weren't. I have to move past this and keep my journey going. I want to make the most of this journey, live each day like it could be my last and have no regrets. If I were to die tomorrow I want people to happily remember me, not hate that they have known me. I think this next week I will start a bucket list. Do I plan on dying anytime soon...absolutely not but we are never promised tomorrow. So I will make the most of today! I will love all that life has to offer me and be thankful that I have been blessed with what truly matters, life, love, family, and friendship! I read yesterday where a lady was living paycheck to paycheck on $174,000 a year. Really....we live paycheck to paycheck on A LOT LESS than that....maybe an 8th of that....really...Selfish much. We are always scraping to make ends meet. But we make the best of what we have and for that I am very thankful.... This blog has been kind of all over the place....but that is ok...its mine... :) and I am kinda all over the place!! ;) I am learning to truly love me for me. and I am ok with that! I know that must sound corny but it is true....I hope you all have a wonderful day...and the thought you should be thinking today I have adopted from Brooke Noel is that :Something great is going to happen to me today and I cant wait to see what it is.: I am super excited to find happiness in the little things in life...like finishing a photo session, booking another photo session... my big puppy curling up and laying her head on my feet, the unconditional love of family, the amazingness of friendship...true friendship....the absolute thrill of learning something new in photography. But you know what makes my day...is my husband sneaking up behind me and wrapping his arms around me and snuggling in close and kissing my neck and him telling me that he loves me and he is so glad he is here with me....the little things are all that matters..... Its the little things in life that bring me the most happiness!!! Hopefully I will be back later today to tell you what was new that I tried today.....
Thursday, April 7, 2011
4-7-11 Thoughts......
"A man becomes what he thinks about all day long."
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
My thoughts represent where I want to go in life and how I want to feel...and where I want to be and how I want to feel today. My goal for this week is to start changing the way I think and feel about different aspects of my life....I have always said that my life is what I make of it...I have always been a firm believer in that statement...I am going to try to start my day out with positive thoughts and hopefully continue to keep positive thoughts all day long. I know that this is going to be much easier said than done....but I have faith in me. After all I believe I can fly.... I know that I am going to make the most of my journey...I am going to do more than just fly...I am going to soar. I am going to hold my head high! I know what I want and I know that there are going to be mountains and instead of asking for them to be moved, I am going to ask for the strength to climb them. We dont ever get anywhere if everything is handed to us on a silver platter or if we are always given a way out. I want to earn what I want and where I want to be by HARD work and persistence. If I dont have to work for it, I will not value it and will be tempted to let it fall apart and just give up! But if I work for it, I will hold it close to my heart and put my soul into it. That is what I have every intention of doing....from my personal relationship, to my business, to my goal of where I want to be! So starting tomorrow when I wake up I am going to try to have positive thoughts....
Weightloss Journey update.....
Back and Forth, Forth and Back!!! 222.....219....221.....222.....its like a freaking roller coaster...of course the last few days have been that way...This morning I was back down to 220.6 Hopefully that number will go down tomorrow. I am sick of not being motivated! I have to start somewhere and today I choose to start climbing the mountain. The mountain of getting healthy and taking my life BACK!! After all it is my life and it is what I make of my journey!
I have been blessed from the word go with great friends....who encourage me and lift me up!! Thank you, you know who you are and how much I adore you!!! I dont know what I would do without you!!!
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
My thoughts represent where I want to go in life and how I want to feel...and where I want to be and how I want to feel today. My goal for this week is to start changing the way I think and feel about different aspects of my life....I have always said that my life is what I make of it...I have always been a firm believer in that statement...I am going to try to start my day out with positive thoughts and hopefully continue to keep positive thoughts all day long. I know that this is going to be much easier said than done....but I have faith in me. After all I believe I can fly.... I know that I am going to make the most of my journey...I am going to do more than just fly...I am going to soar. I am going to hold my head high! I know what I want and I know that there are going to be mountains and instead of asking for them to be moved, I am going to ask for the strength to climb them. We dont ever get anywhere if everything is handed to us on a silver platter or if we are always given a way out. I want to earn what I want and where I want to be by HARD work and persistence. If I dont have to work for it, I will not value it and will be tempted to let it fall apart and just give up! But if I work for it, I will hold it close to my heart and put my soul into it. That is what I have every intention of doing....from my personal relationship, to my business, to my goal of where I want to be! So starting tomorrow when I wake up I am going to try to have positive thoughts....
Weightloss Journey update.....
Back and Forth, Forth and Back!!! 222.....219....221.....222.....its like a freaking roller coaster...of course the last few days have been that way...This morning I was back down to 220.6 Hopefully that number will go down tomorrow. I am sick of not being motivated! I have to start somewhere and today I choose to start climbing the mountain. The mountain of getting healthy and taking my life BACK!! After all it is my life and it is what I make of my journey!
I have been blessed from the word go with great friends....who encourage me and lift me up!! Thank you, you know who you are and how much I adore you!!! I dont know what I would do without you!!!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
4/5/11 Character
Reputation is what men and women think of us. Character is what God and angels know of us ~ Thomas Paine
Saw this quote on twitter tonight. It is a quote that I have heard more than once in my life but I am coming to think of it more often. I wonder why I think so much of what other people think of me. Why does it truly matter to me? Does it affect what I think of myself? No...Does it affect what my family thinks of me? No....So why should I even worry about it. I worry about it because I have always been taught that perception is the key to everything. I worry about it because I feel like negativity towards my business will hurt my business. I shouldn't worry about it because I know myself. I know the negativity is not who I am or who I ever will be. I am proud of who I am and how far I have come. I am proud of where I intend to go. I will not let anyone take that away from me. So there are mountains put in front of me for me to climb....I will not ask for them to be moved, only for the strength to climb them. There will be valleys I am sure....again I will only ask for determination to withstand. Only I can let myself down. I will not allow others to do that for me. Opinions are yours to have. I will not let them tear me down. We have been doing some stuff locally to build up our business, only to be told that our work isn't good enough. That is your opinion. I have seen your work, although I dont agree with your opinion of mine I am sure you wouldn't agree with my opinion on yours. We work very hard on the images that we put out there for our clients and as long as they are happy with them that is what matters. keep trying to tear us down... I feel that in the long run you will only hurt yourself. God dont like ugly. I would appreciate it if in the future if you have issues with me or my work then you bring it to me. You do not discuss it with our clients. Karma is a much bigger biotch than I will ever choose to be.
On another note....I have spent the last few days taking care of my mother in law. I truly wouldnt trade her for the world. but that is another blog entirely. As for my weight loss journey, I am kinda stuck....we have been so busy that we havent slowed down to eat right or exercise. so as of today I am still 219. but I am ok with that. I know that it wont be forever and we will be back on track. Life has just gotten in the way currently. But I wouldnt have it any other way. I am thankful that I have been so incredibly blessed with a family that has taken me in as if I am their own. and I love them so much! After all it is my life and what I make it and right now I am making it about family!! See you soon on this journey again...hopefully this week sometime!!
Saw this quote on twitter tonight. It is a quote that I have heard more than once in my life but I am coming to think of it more often. I wonder why I think so much of what other people think of me. Why does it truly matter to me? Does it affect what I think of myself? No...Does it affect what my family thinks of me? No....So why should I even worry about it. I worry about it because I have always been taught that perception is the key to everything. I worry about it because I feel like negativity towards my business will hurt my business. I shouldn't worry about it because I know myself. I know the negativity is not who I am or who I ever will be. I am proud of who I am and how far I have come. I am proud of where I intend to go. I will not let anyone take that away from me. So there are mountains put in front of me for me to climb....I will not ask for them to be moved, only for the strength to climb them. There will be valleys I am sure....again I will only ask for determination to withstand. Only I can let myself down. I will not allow others to do that for me. Opinions are yours to have. I will not let them tear me down. We have been doing some stuff locally to build up our business, only to be told that our work isn't good enough. That is your opinion. I have seen your work, although I dont agree with your opinion of mine I am sure you wouldn't agree with my opinion on yours. We work very hard on the images that we put out there for our clients and as long as they are happy with them that is what matters. keep trying to tear us down... I feel that in the long run you will only hurt yourself. God dont like ugly. I would appreciate it if in the future if you have issues with me or my work then you bring it to me. You do not discuss it with our clients. Karma is a much bigger biotch than I will ever choose to be.
On another note....I have spent the last few days taking care of my mother in law. I truly wouldnt trade her for the world. but that is another blog entirely. As for my weight loss journey, I am kinda stuck....we have been so busy that we havent slowed down to eat right or exercise. so as of today I am still 219. but I am ok with that. I know that it wont be forever and we will be back on track. Life has just gotten in the way currently. But I wouldnt have it any other way. I am thankful that I have been so incredibly blessed with a family that has taken me in as if I am their own. and I love them so much! After all it is my life and what I make it and right now I am making it about family!! See you soon on this journey again...hopefully this week sometime!!
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